When Too Much Comes Knocking

Before this new year began, I made a drastic decision to do less to accomplish more. (You can read more about it here and here.) This has meant cutting back or even cutting out some things in my schedule. At times, this has felt like cutting off an appendage. But I feel really good with my decision. I have so much more energy now. I'm finally getting a chance to work on things that are most important to me. I'm happier.

I'm also realizing that I have an addiction to busyness. I have an amazing gift of being able to fill my schedule beyond maximum capacity. But that is exactly what I don't want to do, because then I'll end up right where I was before: exhausted, constantly sick, and feeling like a piece of me is dying because I never have time for what matters most to me. I'm not going back. I need to learn a lifestyle that allows for space. I am NOT going to rush to fill up my schedule again. 

...Or am I? This week, the requests, inquiries, and offers have been coming in. I'm not inviting them. I'm not seeking them. They're just coming. It's like some sick test. Will I stick to my word or will I give in? Thoughts of, "But this could be great," or "But the extra cash would be nice," or even, "But what if the opportunities stop coming?" keep coming to my mind. 

But I have to trust that I made the right decision. I have to trust that if I follow God with all my heart, then He is going to take care of me and not let me miss out on something that I'll later regret missing. And I have to trust that when the time comes, I'll be ready for something much greater. There comes a point in life when you have to do what is right for you. This is what I believe I have to do in this season of my life. It's not easy. But I believe that in the end, it will be worth it.